Happy Mother’s Day, dear moms. I hope you feel loved and celebrated today. I hope you are appreciated and are able to appreciate your blessings as a mom.
Yesterday I shared some words of wisdom from a dear friend. Today I have a post I want to share written by one of the most precious women in my life. God has used Kelly in my life in so many ways. We met Kelly and her husband during a very formative time for us — our college years. As a dating and then engaged couple we really learned a lot about marriage from Kelly and Adam. I loved babysitting their awesome kids and seeing how they parented. Many years ago Tommy and I heard Adam talk about how we are stewards of everything and how even his kids didn’t belong to him, he was just stewarding them. That has always stuck in mine and Tommy’s minds. That was before they lost 2 of their sons. And before we lost Gabriel. Tommy and I also believe that the example of how these two walked through that paved the way for how we would walk through losing our child. God has used them in big ways in our lives, and we are so thankful to know them.
Kelly is a wonderful mama, and I look up to her so much. I want to do pretty much everything like her — I want her to come help me decorate my house, teach me new recipes, and more importantly pay attention to my kid’s heart.
I hope you will read these words that she has written. I was incredibly moved by them. As I read her post I realized that I have been off track. I have been more focused on my performance as a mom and Jack’s performance as a kid. I’ve been focused on perfection and not on his heart or mine. His heart is the most important thing to me, and I am so thankful for the reminder of that and the awesome privilege it is to be his mama.
Over the past 12 years of stewarding little stories I have realized the importance of parenting with a pupil’s heart. Moment by moment as they change, I am offered the priceless invitation to grow right alongside them. So, before I launch into what being a mommy means to me… I feel led to begin with what I know it is not. Being a mommy is NOT about being an expert or getting it perfect. Instead, it’s ignoring the reoccurring voice of fear… choosing to be a constant learner and daily embracing the greatest gift of all… grace.
In our crazy, wild home, being a mommy means knowing my 4 Smalls have just as much if not more to teach me… than I have to teach them. It means… apologizing often … laughing at myself, dancing crazily as people watch, nursing ailments and personal “chefing” for little bellies with special dietary needs. It means advocating health on ALL levels (spiritual, emotional, physical and mental). It means super- raggedy homeschooling. It means equipping and celebrating successes in the midst of giant failures. It means modeling out respect and honor beginning with my relationship with their daddy. It means publicly grieving over pain filled losses as well as publicly belly laughing as I play. And, in my less than glamorous world, it means… being transparent enough to admit… most days I don’t really know what I am doing. I too, am just a little person in need of MUCH GUIDANCE as I walk out this God-given assignment. And, not only do I deeply desire the grace-gift they carry, I desperately need it.
To be completely honest, I have received more education in these past 12 years of being a mom than I could’ve ever obtained at any prestigious university. And yet somehow I feel like I know less than ever before. So, at the end of everyday… I always come back to this one thing… GRACE. Being a mommy means an abundance of grace-exchanges. At some point on my journey I hope to receive a “Masters” in this subject. But, today, I am just thankful to have the opportunity to sit under some of the most powerful, little teachers my heart has ever known. So thankful.
Thank you, Kelly, for sharing your words and wisdom!
Happy Mother’s Day to my mom! She has been a rock for me my whole life. She works hard and is so respected and loved by all of us. Mom, you take such good care of all of us — still — and I’m so very thankful to have you as my mother. I love you!
Happy Mother’s Day to my mother-in-law also — to the woman who raised the love of my life. You raised a wonderful man, and I’m so thankful for that. We love you!
If you know anyone who has lost a child or could use a pick me up today, share my letter for mama’s with them.
On this day, I’m acutely aware of how hard it can be. Last year was awful. It was 1 week after Gabriel was born and died, and I can’t believe I even got out of bed that day. But I did, and I don’t remember a lot of it. But it was a very hard day. I know there are many reasons for people to be sad today. The cemetery is pack on Mother’s Day — mostly with people visiting the graves of their mom’s, but for some like me, it is to visit the graves of our children. Whether today is hard because of death of a mother or a child, infertility, dreams that haven’t happened, just know that you aren’t alone.